Drivers Education - Ray Stevens

Well, now there was no driver’s ed program where our kids went to school

I said, «I'm no Richard Petty, but I’m nobody’s fool»

I said, «I don’t need to pay someone to teach my son to drive

I’ll teach him everything I know, that way, he will survive»

So I drove to the country, sat him behind the wheel

But before I handed him the keys, I said, «Now, listen, here’s the deal»

«There's a whole lot that you need to know before you put this thing in gear»

He said, «Daddy, I know everything, I’ve been watching you for years»

«On the highway, drive as fast as you can

Keep a sharp lookout for the Man

And be careful not to let some fool get ahead of you

Yell at the folks who drive too slow

Blow your horn if they still won’t go

And Daddy, now that I’m driving, can I use those words you use?»

This is the story of a driver’s education

And it really doesn’t need much explanation

It’s more or less the product of a painful revelation

The story of a driver’s education (Education)

I said, «Now, hold on there a minute, son, that’s not exactly right»

He said, «Oh yeah, I forgot the part about how to drive at night»

«Always keep your bright lights on

So you can see what’s going on

And if those other folks don’t like it

Well, they know what they can do

And you can run red lights when no one’s around

And stop signs only mean 'slow down'

See, Daddy?

I’ve been watching

I know everything you do»

So I took the wheel and drove us home, I had a lot to think about

I resisted the temptation several times to rant and rave and shout

The next day I enrolled our son in a professional driving school

And they taught him to be an excellent driver, and I learned a few things too

This is the story of a driver’s education

And it really doesn’t need much explanation

It’s more or less the product of a painful revelation

The story of a driver’s education (Education)