Hyrule Warrior's Heart - Random Encounters

They sing songs!

They tell tales!

About me, the Hyrule Warrior!

With my sword and my shield,

And a satchel that’s full of my junk!

I will slay every beast!

Every chest will be mine to plunder!

I’m the Hero of Time

With a Hyrule Warrior’s heart!

LINK!

HYAAAAH!

Er, I mean… Ganondorf, what are you doing here?!

That’s none of your Chu Jelly, worm!

Whoa!

Excuuuuse me, Princess, but I’m the Great Hyrule Warrior!

The only thing YOU’RE great at is getting pecked to death by chickens.

Step aside!

Or you’ll die

At the hands of the Hyrule Warrior!

I’m too swift and too strong

For a hero who’s wearing a dress!

(It's a tunic!)

I’ll bathe in your blood!

Though bathing isn’t my strong suit…

I may smell like a pig,

But I’ve a Hyrule Warrior’s heart!

Careful with your knives, boys.

WHAT THE-

HOOOOOO- Argh!

Dangit!

Wait.

You can’t POSSIBLY-

-be the Hyrule Warrior?

All my life, I’ve stood by,

Dreaming I was the Hyrule Warrior!

Cause I’m smart, and I’m rich!

-And you’re prone to dress up as a man.

I don’t smash people’s pots!

And I never lose battles to children!

Every game has my name,

Cause I’ve a Hyrule Warrior’s heart!

Neither Nayru’s Love, nor Farore’s Wind,

Nor the Fires of Din compare

To my Courage/Power/Wisdom and my Warrior’s heart!

Feel my wrath!

Take a bath!

Why does nobody save you in any game other than me?

(Don't… Blame… Me!!!)

You’re a twit.

You’re insane!

I’m a princess who’s destined for greatness!

All the land knows that I have a

Heart of a Hy-rule Warrior!

I stopped the moon!

I woke a fish!

I shot things with a crossbow!

Heck, I survived the CD-i (with my)

Heart of a Hy-rule Warrior!

I have legions of beasts!

From Dodongos to Keese!

You can take that gold brassiere and stuff it!

And to prove I’m the best, I’ll tear out from your chest that dumb

Heart of a Hy-rule Warrior!