Medics Don't Heal Scouts (feat. Dodger) - Random Encounters, Dodger

Hey Medic!

Don’t go!

Please, my health bar’s pretty low!

Look, the Heavy needs my help!

I’m a busy man, you know!

Come on, show me some compassion!

Forget the status quo!

Sorry, Medics… don’t heal Scouts!

Hey, c’mon, Doc, I’m dying' here!

Clearly…

Wait, Doc, I’m in pain!

Any moment, I’ll be slain!

There’s a bullet in my chest-

And a screw loose in your brain…

Oh, the lights are fading quickly~

This is only just a sprain.

That’s why Medics… don’t heal Scouts!

«Uh, I also got stabbed in the ankle-»

«Go find a Health Kit.»

I’m begging on my knees here

Cause it hurts too much to stand!

I’m the fastest friggin' member of your team!

«True, but-»

You’re also pretty puny,

With the IQ of a crayon,

And you have the most unhealthy self esteem!

«That's not true!

I think I’m AWESOME!»

Doc, give me one chance!

Yes, I know your friggin' stance!

But my heart’s starting to fail me,

And I think I crapped my pants-

You can stitch me, saw me, sew me-

Embed friggin' dove implants-

«…deal!»

«Really?»

«Yes, but just this once, though, because-»

Medics… don’t heal Scouts!