Dawnguard - Dan Bull

The Dragonborn returns to life

With awful burning eyes

To the hidden fortress

The time has dawned

To turn the tide

Return the prince’s daughter

To the north across the water

Lean off my horse

And slaughter all

Before I pick a side

Do I take on the demon form

Beneath an evil storm

Feast on peoples' necks

As if their head’s

Atop a piece of corn?

Or do I support the dawnguard

And ward the heartless darkness

Your fallen carcass torn apart

To ensure you’re harmless?

I walk forward

Regardless of the peril

Feral my blades of glory’ll

Gore an elf Will Ferrell

I’ve maxed the level cap

Stamina, Magicka, Health

Collected every shout

Successfully bettered myself

I’ve worked the perks

Earned a purse

Spent my septims

And now I’m heading out

It’s none of your concern

But nevertheless

I can confirm

That yes I might become sunburt

My melanin’s red

As the Whiterun sun turned

When I ready my crossbow

Your head’ll be redder

Than central Moscow

I use so many bolts

I get them wholesale

From Costco

Action packed With Dragons

Smashing splashy patches

Bats and axes

Hacking you up

Haphazardly

Like medical malpractice

I am the Dragonborn

And I still wear the hat

With badass horns

I’ve fought swarms

Of forsworn hordes

And now I’m after more