Shape of You Parody - Bart Baker

The club isn’t the best to stalk a lover so the gym is where I go

That is where I spy on you when you box and pretend I box also

I’ve got a weird obsession with the shape of your body, this creepy song is all

about that

Like your hands, nose, the shape of your ears, hips, and throat and the shape

of your mouth

Now I’m singing like…

What size are your boxing gloves?

Show me your hand shape

Hold on, what?

Excuse me

Come on now, just let me see

I may be crazy, don’t mind me

Say boy, your head is messed up

Don’t touch my waist

Why are you measuring me?

Because I love your body

Umm… OMG you are a freak

I’m in love with the shape of you

I made a body diagram too

Your stomach is real flat and smooth

And your butt’s round and bubbly

Last night I was in your room

And I stole this red bra from you

That’s how I figured out the shape of your boobs

Can I measure your inseam?

Weirdo, weirdo, weirdo, weirdo

You’re obsessed with my body

Don’t go, don’t go, don’t go, don’t go

What shape are your nipples please?

One week in and you come back to the gym, so glad to see your body

Watching from the distance so you wouldn’t see me

It was like we were on our second date

I watched for hours and hours even when you took a shower

Making mental pics of all of your shapes

I left a note in your locker

Signed your body stalker

Let’s both get naked, what do you say?

And now you’re singing like…

Weirdo, do you even box?

Or do you just come to this gym to stalk me?

And inspect my body?

Goddamit and stop measuring me

Umm… girl, yes of course I box

Okay, then prove it

Throw a left hook at me

Can I first measure your feet?

Wait, hold on are those my panties?

I stole them from the locker room

Okay, this has to end right now dude

I’m getting in that ring with you

I’m gonna beat your body

Objectifying girls is rude

We have personalities too

We’re more than just hot bodies

Show me your boobs

I’m in love with your body

Why are you such a psychopath?

I’m in love with your body

Look, I even made a butt graph

It’s shaping up quite nicely

I’m gonna knock your teeth out man

This is making me horny

Can I please cover all your shapes with this lube

Here’s two shapes I got just for you