The Ramblin' Rover - Silly Wizard

Oh, there’re sober men and plenty

And drunkards barely twenty

There are men of over ninety

Who have never yet kissed a girl

But give me a ramblin' rover

From Orkney down to Dover

We will roam the country over

And together we’ll face the world

There’s many that feign enjoyment

From merciless employment

Their ambition was this deployment

From the minute they left the school

And they save and scrape and ponder

While the rest go out and squander

See the world and rove and wander

And are happier as a rule

I have roamed through all the nations

In delight of all creations

And enjoyed a wee sensation

Where the company, it was kind

And when barkin' was no pleasure

I’ve drunk another measure

To the good friends that were treasure

For they always around were mine

If you’re bent with arthritis

Your bowels have got Colitis

You’re gallopin' with balacitis

And you’re thinkin' it’s time you died

If you been a man of action

Though you’re lying there in traction

You will get some satisfaction

Thinkin', «Jesus, at least I tried.»