Partners In Crime - Rupert Holmes

She’s under-age and she’s underweight

And she’s one month hooked and she’s two months late

She comes from Wyoming

And he named her Desiree

She hit New York like a farm-fresh egg

Hits a frying pan, she’s too proud to beg

So she works on the sidewalk

He administrates her pay

She calls him Swagger 'cause of his hat

He adopted her in three seconds flat

By the bus station doorway

Where he found her half-alive

He is her family and in return

He beats up on her and takes all she can earn

And she needs him so badly

Losing him she’d never survive

Him and her, me and you

We do it to each other whatever we do Hand in hand, arm in arm

It’s always been the two of us doing us harm

It’s the same deal every time

We’re all of us partners in crime

She is a buyer for Bloomingdale’s

He’s division head of commercial sales

They met at the office

Odds we one to one they’d meet

Work is the great aphrodisiac

It’s that nine-to-five gets 'em in the sack

Afternoons at the office

Evenings at the health retreat

And all day long he just balls her out

'Bout some shipment due on the air freight route

But when they leave the office

Guess who gets the upper hand?

She’s into power, he’s into pain

And beneath her heel, he will long remain

And he needs her so badly

Loves it when she takes command

Him and her, me and you

We do it to each other whatever we do Hand in hand, arm in arm

It’s always been the two of us doing us harm

It’s the same deal every time

We’re all of us partners in crime

If there’s a heaven, if there’s a hell

It’s made up of those who we love so well

And we make hell or heaven

As we do when we’re alive

Two people meet and they fix their deal

And they get what they deserve

And they want the way they feel

And we need love so badly

Losing it we’d never survive

Him and her, me and you

We do it to each other whatever we do Hand in hand, arm in arm

It’s always been the two of us doing us harm

It’s the same deal every time

We’re all of us partners in crime