Shvartza - Rucka Rucka Ali

Hear a knock on the door, it’s the cops again

(We know you’re in there)

Said, «Hold on, could I finish my chicken?»

(Almost done with this bucket)

They said, «We got a report that you did some shit»

(SHEIT!)

I said, «Please officer, let me explain»

(I'm a splain you)

You see I’m a Black man

In Arabic they call me Abed

It’s Mooley in Italian

But if you ask the Jews how to say it

They’ll say

I am a Shvartza

Playin magic cards-tza

Throwin me some darts-tza

Tryin to have Fun

I am a Shvartza

Stealin shoppin carts-tza

Wish upon a star-tza

Swingin round my gun

(Nice try pal)

(You're coming with us)

Break into yo house

(I'm tellin' you the truf man)

(Tell it to the judge)

Lemme take yo couch

(Thanks man)

Police took me to jail where I stayed all day

(I remember this place)

(Woogie boogie)

Took me weed, and my gun, and my Gucci shades

(Where my Shades, man?)

(I can’t see)

Went to court and the judge said, «What do you say?»

(How do you plead young man?)

I said your honor, lemme talk if I may

(May I 'proach this court)

I’m a nigga you see

Maw la cha in Cantonese

Vaole zwetzak in Flemish

Fuzzy in British

And the way to say it in Yiddish is

I am a Shvartza

Drawin' me some hearts-tza

Doin' crafts and arts-tza

Never met my son

I am a Shvartza

Lettin' out some farts-tza

Oops that was a Shart-tza

Fried Kool-Aid for lunch

(I sentence you to death row)

(The record label?)

Break into yo House

(But I’m only 35, man)

(I ain’t even finish high school)

Can I stay on yo couch?

(Any last words?)

I’m a Shvartza

Ridin golf carts

In the park

In the dark

And I’m eatin' Pop Tarts-tza

When fire starts

You know I ain’t far-tza

Burn down the city

'Cause I finish what I start-tza

Your dog barks at me

When I walk by

I’m like why

But I’m smart

Steal your car

For it’s parts-tza

End up behind bars

Watching Bill Maher

And I keep gettin' my ass beat

By the jail guards

Shvartza

Shoppin at Walmart -tza

I don’t work too hard-tza

Hanging in the sun

I am Ben Carson

Driving in my car-son

Drinking at the bar-son

Presidential run

(I will be running for office of America)

Break in the White House

(It's the job I need)

(Under conditions of my parole)

C’mon man, this my House

(And I also sellin' magazine subscriptions)

Break into yo house

(And so I ask you American people to vote my ass President)

(Please)