The Mob Rap, Pt. 6 - JT Music

You already know the undead abomination

Better lock all your doors cuz I wanna break in

This OG Zombie’s still just as grisly

Daddy I’m hungry — son, I’m busy

But I want brains!

I’m working on it now, kid

You’re dead to me!

That’s it, you’re grounded

I wish I had time for a longer verse

I’m still a zombie, but a father first

That doesn’t mean you can’t get back on the saddle

When I hit the scene, you know bones will rattle

I’m a bowman whose skills are long reputed

I’ll strike you in the heart with an arrow — Cupid

Beg for mercy, you’ll find I’m heartless

Run and hide cuz I do not miss my targets

The sun goes down, that’s when we get started

But when my Mobs spot you, you’ll get bombarded

That’s what I think of you

You got a problem with a llama?

Try to bring it dude

I’ll hock a loogie on your face

And put you and your obnoxious dogs in place

Don’t try to tame me because that will fail

Wait, is that hay?

Let me have a bale

Please just don’t load up my back with a chest

I’m not a pack mule, I would rather be dead

It’s okay my man, I’m a fan of animals

My land is fertile with plants and vegetables

All organic with plenty of edibles

And my Golem guards are all dependable

It would be a shame if it all got pillaged

Oh no, illagers are taking my village

The Evoker’s sure to get you Vexed

No griefers man, did you read the text?

Don’t trust your eyes, or I’ll rob you blind

I don’t need to be a witch to play tricks on your mind

Forget magic, I’d rather use an axe kill

Is this Minecraft or a slasher film?

Neither — I’m weaving a web that’ll lead you to death

Don’t even think about leaving, I will eat you instead

So be careful if you come across a cave

Only thing I’m digging is a mob-sized grave

I’m not a miner, I’m a fighter, sick of hiding

Soon I’ll retire with my diamonds to an island

Forget about survival

This rap will be your final

Just face the doom you can’t avoid

When I’m gone you’ll be unemployed

Can it, grampa, your career has fizzled

I hop on the beat and make the track sizzle

Listen for the hiss, it’s your signal to run

My rhymes are explosive and no that isn’t a pun

Woops, does anyone have a light?

Honestly this never happens, my fuse won’t ignite

Don’t judge me, I’m getting old for a creeper

Now you’ll think twice to call me an old geezer

Somebody needs a light you say?

Leave that to blaze I stay lit all day

Blaze nation is going all the way

Try to put me out, I’ll smoke you like a vape

Dishing out blaze rods — my bars are flaming

I drop 'em like they’re hot — can I get an amen?

Representing the Nether forever

Bring your friends man, you’ll be Blazin' together

I’m back with a vengeance, suckers

The chicken is in the house, mothercluckers

I’ve laid so many eggs you’ll get stuck with

I ain’t the kind of bird that you wanna pluck with

Chicken, come on, you’re giving us a bad reputation

Nobody asked you, ya fat slob of bacon

I’m the cockiest kind of livestock

And if you disagree you can suck on my — STOP!

I’m not a miner, I’m a fighter, sick of hiding

Soon I’ll retire with my diamonds to an island

This fight will be your last one

Just need a brief distraction

Look, singing dirtblocks!

Right behind you!

Oh, really?

Can they harmonize too?

What kind of world would you live in without me?

We will support you all, the earth beneath your feet

This crazy world is turning but this dirt will hold its ground

Excuse me who are you and can you put me down?

Sorry, carrying block is just something I like

Hey, haven’t we met at an open mic?

Why am I even on this track?

I never signed up for this — NO EYE CONTACT

I really don’t want to sit through this again

So let me teleport straight to the End

For the last time, rapping isn’t something I enjoy

Then pass me the mic and let me destroy

DJ DeadPig, spin that shit

Been spending time in the lab, refining my rap

The only craft that you’ve mastered is mining — it’s sad

All of y’all have made these raps a living hell for me

Can’t even think for yourselves — mob mentality

You got elementary rhymes, I break a mental sweat with mine

When you rejected me, I spent time perfecting every line

Spitting literal fire, with formidable size

If you belittle me it’ll fail, my confidence flies

Cut the beat

I don’t need to hear a beat to lyrically annihilate you

Y’all so far beneath me, makes it hard for me to hate you

Step up to my level, then we’ll get to talkin' business

You know the game I’m playing — survival of the fittest

Your writtens are for children, I’ll show you that I’m better

I’ll have your music box blasting the Ghast’s platinum record

And before I drop this mic, I’ll drop a bomb on this mob army

Y’all are long outdated, I’m bouncing out this block party