Manic Heart Disease - Hit the Switch

Can’t stop the hell you said but you didn’t even try

And what reasons did you use to make it seem alright

And it’s been getting old and I’m not fighting for your time

It’s just that I want to get by

So I’ll just keep myself inside

'cause no one needs to know about the old critical me

There’s unstoppable sadness

And I’m not moving on with it I know

There’s still this pain and guilt I feel within we all should know

Just what it’s like to live like them

To really need help and never get it

Not that it matters quite as much to me

I know I’m not the same

And all of the time I spent alone

I still lost myself to this

And when I look back

I want to know that I did what I could with this

To give all I can give

In someone’s last defense

I know we’re not incapable

We just dismiss the warning signs

We’re so detached from feeling what they might

Excused from the collective guilt

The margin shifts

But no one stops to give a shit

So I won’t force a smile

When everyone is having so much fun

It just doesn’t feel right

I can’t forget why everything’s so sad

And it’s digging out my heart

Until nothing’s left

The house we built within stands in contempt

Then I felt so ashamed

We took all we’re allowed

Gave nothing back

I pray for wild teeth

Cut right across my neck

Spill my insides

Are worth way more than I’m meant to keep

And when I’m gone it’s not in vein

Their lives are not ours to forsaken

When all your good intentions aren’t enough

And I can’t help but feel like giving up

'cause I can’t be the one to pick you up

(To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get

used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you.

To seek joy in the saddest places.

To pursue beauty to its lair.

To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple.

To respect strength, never power.

Above all, to watch.

To try and understand.

To never look away.

And never, never to forget.)

Some were all lost some way out there

Somewhere those lost their hope and care

And some hold on instead

Left open all gather to stare

Their eyes tell stories going nowhere

The point fades in and out of view

This wasn’t meant for us to take

Can’t put it back once it’s been changed

The more I try I learn how not to

Run away from all my problems

Pulling back to find what caused them all this time

I just kept it to myself in fear of

Everything that’s left

It falls apart and I’m not strong enough to

Keep the dark at bay

This is where I remain

I won’t let you know

I’ll stay here alone

I’m stuck in this place that’s never been home

And I’m still here all alone

It never changed these outer shells

Won’t keep me warm at night

Where resentment and silence grow

I know that this all falls on me

And I can’t be here for you

When it comes apart

I have let you down

Just tell me what you need

And as it softly puts you down to sleep

And all you have to do is die here next to me

When we both lie beneath

This crumbled world is obsolete

And fading out as we reached the edge

I still hold you close to me for one last time

Then we both drift aside