Subtle Thrill - Gouge Away

Sometimes it looks like help

Other times it looks like a way out

I can’t figure it out

If it’s the little things that set me off

Or if I’m just not numb enough

Temptation;

I’m tempted

Hardened to stone

At least it’s the company I need

Comforting me to sleep

Shutting the curtains

And weighing the eyelids

Its black and its quiet

Covers up like a blanket

Too heavy to push off

Too engulfed to get up

Resistance and will

Embrace the subtle thrill

The uncertainty of never waking up

I’ve just been trying to quit

Whatever that means

Hurt is a commodity