santa made me do it - Field Medic

Sitting there in that dark saloon

Playing cards to a rag time tune

A big old fellow started eyeing me mean

& on his hip he had an iron machine

Well I had one too

But I didn’t wanna use it

Till he reached for his

& I had to beat him to it

Shot him thru his heart

Like an arrow from cupid

& I can’t be to blame

Cuz santa made me do it

Later that night on a midnight right

Passed by a ranchers house with a colt outside

Then I shared a look

Between my horse & I

& in that moment

Him & I conspired

So I hopped that fence

& I coo’d that colt

Gave him a carrot to chomp on

While I untied him from the post

Lead him down the trail

He became my new pet

& it’s not my fault

Cuz santa made me do it

The next town I hit I do decree

There was a fancy bank full of currency

So I stepped inside with my trusty six shooter

& just to prove I was a big bad bank robber

I shot one in the air, told em «Hit the floor

Give me everything you’ve got, & then some more»

I tossed my sack to the old bank teller

He said: «Ain't you that bandit, santa’s little helper?»

I said «Yes I am»

& there’s no way that I wasn’t

& it’s not me robbing you

It’s really santa who does it

& he said

«Ain't you the one with a bag full of loot

& who burst in here with a bullet to shoot?»

I said «I've got five more, don’t make me prove it, & if anything should happen,

santa made me do it.»