Grandpa Can't Fly His Kite - Clarence Carter

I went down to the bar to have myself a drink

'Cause Grandpa had given me some news and I had to think

The bartender said «Have a drink of gin, 'cause drinkin' gin ain’t no sin»

But I told the bartender that drinkin' gin won’t let your nature bend

Grandpa can’t fly his kite

'Cause Grandma won’t give it no tail, no

So you see, I’ve got to use what Mother Nature gave me

Before Father Time takes it away, yeah

The mother rabbit told the father rabbit

She said «Sex ain’t nothin' but a habit»

The father rabbit told the mother rabbit

«Well, baby, shoot the habit to me rabbit»

The male bee makes love to the queen bee

Until she cries

He knows when he finishes makin' love

He’s surely gonna die

But you see, Grandpa can’t fly his kite

'Cause Grandma won’t give it no tail, no

So I’m gonna use what Mother Nature gave me

Before Father Time takes it away, yeah

I told you, I got sixteen inches

And it’s four inches thick

And the first day I don’t make love

I’ll take gravely sick

I feel sorry for Grandpa

Because I know what he wants to do

And that’s how come I came over to your house

Because I got to make love to you

You see, Grandpa can’t fly his kite

'Cause Grandma won’t give no tail, no, shake it

So I got to use what Mother Nature gave me

Before Father Time takes it away, yeah

(Instrumental Break)

I went to see my doctor, just the other day

He said, «Clar, you won’t last too long if you don’t slow down the pace»

I said, «Listen, doctor, good lovin' ain’t no sin

But if that good stuff kill me, then let me go with the breeze»

Grandpa can’t fly his kite

'Cause Grandma won’t give no tail, no

So I got to use what Mother Nature gave me

Before Father Time takes it away, yeah

One more verse…

Grandpa and Grandma were layin' in the bed

And Grandpa turned over, and this is what he said

He said, «Wake up Grandma, don’t sleep so damned sound

'Cause that ain’t what you promised when we first laid down»

Grandpa can’t fly his kite

'Cause Grandma won’t give no tail, yeah, yeah, yeah

So I got to use what Mother Nature gave me

Before Father Time takes it away, yeah