What If Eminem Did Jingle Bells? - Bob Rivers

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride

grab a boat to east LA

It’s just a white Christmas (hello my man)

I’m leaving blood in the snow and smacking fat men

You mean Santa, that boy’s a bitch

He caught my mom «Christmas cheatin'"tryin' to give her kiss

Fo' real he’s no joke, that guy don’t play

He tried to ride way more than a one-horse-sleigh

Laughing all the way, but he’s not laughing today

Jingle more than his bells, even the elves with pay

COME CHRISTMAS EVE, OLD NICK’S A GONNER!

We’ll be snacking on deer, EATIN' Blitzen and Donor

Not a question of when, not even a maybe

Have a drunk Mrs. Clause saying, «Jingling Baby!»

Give a new meaning to «ho, ho, ho»

Shake that ass girl, bump your booty in the snow

So watch out Santa, you jolly old troll

We’ll be strippin' that sleigh and leave you cold

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride in a cop drop Chevrolet, hey

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride

grab a boat to east LA

Playing reindeer games, hell yeah my friend

Grab Rudolph’s horns, see how far they bend

When the snow turns bad, hand jacks off in bed

Back out to the woods with his faggy elf friend

Oh, Santa Claus did molest me last night

In fact, could have me listed as 'naughty' twice

Not cuz' of the fight, or the Christmas gift hype,

Because of the nog, I left on his white

It’s time for old nick to move and retire

Or we roast his nuts on a bigass fire

Yes I’m that bad, Yes, I’m that crued

I mean your ass is huge, lose weight, for real dude

All the cookies and milk, simply quite jk

I mean, when’s the last time you’ve seen your dick

I don’t mean to throw a fit and I’m not one to bitch

But every year I get underwear, socks, and shit

(Bob Rivers as Eminem:)

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride in a cop drop Chevrolet, hey

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride

Grab a boat to east LA

(yo)

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride in a cop drop Chevrolet, hey

(yo, yo)

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

Jingling all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride

grab a boat to east la