The Conducator - Benny Andersson, Orsa Spelmän

Silence suddenly is

Shattered by the blaring of

Trumpets and a booming voice

As a herald proudly announces:

These are happy times and

We should all rejoice

So make way for the king

The queen and the prince

The princess and nephews and nieces and others

So make way for the king

His uncle, his aunt

His cousins and sisters and brothers

Husbands and wives and their mothers

I’m the conducator

No-one's task is greater

Huge is my responsibility

I’m the guide, or rather

Like a loving father

Of a big and happy family

Never mind if there is no

Hot water for our showers

A new era rises in

Spirals of red flowers

What a great, heroic quest!

I think by now they know

I always know what’s best

Lack of moderation

Over-consummation

Used to lead to gout and heart disease

Truly I was sad to

But I really had to

Circumscribe their daily calories

Everywhere I go people

Show me their devotion

I confess I’m almost

Choking with emotion

When, in their spontaneous ways

They all bend over backwards

Just to sing my praise

He’s a light, he’s a beacon in a

Wild and treacherous ocean

And we’re all proud to see him

Choking with emotion

When in our spontaneous ways

We all bend over backwards

Just to sing his praise

Customs are abolished

Villages demolished

It’s all part of my inspired plan

If some thick, old peasant

Doesn’t find that pleasant

All I say is: That’s too bad, old man!

We all know our conducator

Is a man of vision

In the course of progress what’s a

Little demolision

That’s the spirit I admire!

The sort of true enthusiasm I inspire

All our fields our rivers and

Mountains kneel before him

Children and blind widows even

Animals adore him

These are truly happy times

No unemployment

No inflation

And no crime

Happy times!