'75: My Mama Ain't - The Magnetic Fields

My mama ain’t no

madam

Massage is all they do

Law troubles, sure, she’s had 'em

Been stopped for speeding too

She says she ain’t no hippy

I guess beatnik’s the word

She says the world is trippy

Enough, drugs are absurd

She was an English teacher

Her Master’s was in Ed

But she taught Harriet Beecher

Stowe and got fir-ed

My mama ain’t no loony

But she likes joining cults

She could’ve been a Moonie

With similar results

She gave away her monies

And all our furnishings

To benefit the bunnies

And all sentient beings

She flirted once with yoga

We stayed on an ashram

The guru wore a toga — in Saratoga!

We chanted

Bhaja govindam

My mama ain’t no nudist

Except around the pool

She’s a Tibetan Buddhist

Like Catholic only cool

Now Mama’s going Vedanta

A similar belief

Her friends look more like Santa

And much less like Gurdjieff

My Mom’s a little flaky

Believes in everything

From auras to zen reiki

Except crystal healing

She draws the line at crystal healing